Be Kind to Yourself (10/03/16)
When you tell the Universe one thing... and then feel another thing... and believe something else... chile I know Jesus just be looking at me like *insert a shady Prince face*
In short, be kind to yourself. You are doing the best that you can. And if you feel you aren't, step your game up and start doing the best that you can. Stop comparing your journey to everyone else's. Stop, I repeat STOP listening to what everyone else says or what you *think* they would say. Be open. Be open. Be open. Oh, and get you a friend/homie/lover who will listen to you and tell you (gently) when your shit stank. Thanks to my partner (and countless others who stay in my inbox reminding me [unbeknownst to them] that I'm doing alright).
I wrote this when I did not believe it. I was not kind to myself. It was a thing that I saw people say that sounded real gentle and real good, and so I said it, but I wasn't doing it. Not really. I wrote this advice when my world was falling apart. I tortured myself daily, combing over the many ways in which I'd fucked up, and continued to fuck up (at least, that's how I saw it). All of it was growth. They neglect to mention that growing "pains" can feel like a kind of death. Because it is a kind of death.
It would take me five additional years to really begin to be kind to myself. To really accept that I am doing the best that I can, and that my best will look different from day to day. I still struggle with comparing what my life looks like to everyone else, but I'm getting better. Thanks to my partner, my babies, them folk in my inbox, tarot, Spirit, and my therapist, I'mma be aight. It takes a village.
You gon' be aight, too, if you wanna be.